Are You Controlling in Your Relationships?

October 8, 2014 1:34 AM

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Are You Controlling in Your Relationships?

Cindy, on the other hand, tends to focus on Justin's reactions to her. Cindy wants control over Justin being warm, accepting and understanding. When Justin is judgmental and withdrawn, Cindy feels unsafe and tries to control Justin with her niceness and care-taking, Cindy gives herself up and tries to do what Justin wants her to do in order to control his feelings about her and his reactions toward her. Eventually, when Justin does not give her the acceptance she desires, she gets angry, but niceness and care-taking are her first lines of control. Love for Cindy means someone being accepting of her and she wants control over this.

It's easy to see Justin's controlling behavior. His anger, judgmentalness and withdrawal are quite obvious. It's harder to see that Cindy is actually just as controlling as Justin -- not about what he does, but about how he reacts to her.

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