Low Sex Drive Could Be A Cause, Not Effect, Of Low Testosterone In Older Men

March 11, 2015 6:40 PM

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Low Sex Drive Could Be A Cause, Not Effect, Of Low Testosterone In Older Men

The main reason people don't have sex is because it isn't rewarding. Not wanting sex that isn't enjoyable isn't a "dysfunction" -- it's common sense. There are dozens of reasons sex becomes unenjoyable. Some couples (or one partner) gets stuck on intercourse, deriding everything else as "foreplay" or "just fooling around." Some people get too focused on orgasm -- a mere few seconds in a 15-minute or 30-minute enterprise that should be enjoyable on its own. When orgasm is the only thing that's appealing, people race through sex to get the "good part." You may recall how much you used to enjoy kissing; perhaps you still yearn for it. In many long-term couples, sex no longer involves kissing, and so they don't get sufficiently aroused. Kissing is actually the most intimate sexual activity. Yes, really -- after all, most of us have had intercourse when we've been upset with someone, but have you every passionately kissed someone you were angry with? No, no one does that.

Pleasure can be a big part of sex, but it's hard to feel pleasure when you're angry, sad, or hurt. Intimacy can also be a big part of sex, and it's hard to create it or feel it when you're focused on performance, or when you feel guilty, ashamed, or anxious. When couples quarrel once or twice every ...

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