Happiness Is an Inside Job | Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

February 24, 2015 3:52 PM

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We have all been brought up to believe that different external things are responsible for our happiness. I was raised to believe that happiness was related to people, events and outcomes. In other words, my happiness had to come from being in a relationship, from having good things happen, and from having control over the good things happening. My parents were not into things like houses, cars or toys, so I never learned to connect my happiness with things. But lots of people do.

For example, Allen connects his happiness to people, things and outcomes. As a result, he is constantly pulling on others for attention and approval. He is addicted to buying things and his garage is cluttered with his toys. And he can't be happy until he "finds the perfect job" and "makes more mone...

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