Bracket’s Gone and Not Even Mad

March 23, 2015 1:00 AM

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Bracket’s Gone and Not Even Mad

First, a bit of fantastic news: My 2016 March Madness basketball bracket is perfect. I mean, that thing is gorgeous. Pristine. Unblemished. Haven’t lost a single game. I’m crushing 2016. I have my picks like LSU rolling and Texas A&M going deep, and, in the final, I have Dartmouth getting stomped by my sleeper, the New Jersey Institute of Technology. At the moment, I am the toast of the 2016 office pool. I’m going to win the first-place vacation to Riviera Maya. I really want Warren Buffett to bring his March Madness contest back, because I’m going to swipe all of Warren Buffett’s money. Sorry, Warren Buffett, but I’m going to clean you out. All I need is for 2016 to be here.

My 2015 March Madness basketball bracket? Oh, that died. My bracket was declared dead last Thursday. Maybe it actually died Wednesday. The cause of death was—as always—my own dopiness. I should have known as soon as I picked Iowa State to beat UAB. Or Baylor over Georgia State. I should have known w...

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