Expectancy is a funny thing. It seems the more you focus on a specific outcome, the more attainable that outcome becomes. And nowhere is this mentality more important than it is with regards to improving the quality of life of family caregivers.
I once took a high-performance driving course (don't ask me why). The instructor drilled into the class that if you lose control of a car and are heading for a wall, "Do not focus on the wall; instead, focus on where you want to go."