4 Things I Never Say to My Daughters

November 18, 2014 10:37 PM

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1. Does this make me look fat? Especially as my daughters grow older, I can't tell you the number of times I've been tempted to ask them this or some variation of it. Do I look too old? Do I look pretty? Trying on clothes, walking down the street, seeing another woman my age -- the triggers are everywhere. But I bite my lip -- hard -- and turn away. I don't want them to know how hyper-conscious women are of their appearance, and how we compete with the women around us. They'll find that out soon enough, but not from me.

2. You're wearing that? An oldie, but goodie. Undermining and critical without being even remotely constructive. These days, I try to steer clothing choices discreetly in the direction of what's appropriate, but also to button my lip when an outfit doesn't match my own sense of what's cute. As long ...

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